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There will come a time in your life when you’ll realize that what you are doing is actually against what you’ve been wishing. I am actually still thinking if I should make this post but yes I am writing it now, for the sake of readers and other women who might be experiencing the same. Since a long time ago, I have been trying myself to find and be recognized by The One. But it seem to work the other way around. Of course we all want to be happy with our partners and as much as possible grow old with them. We want a lifetime relationship that has an exact blend and chemistry. But are we also preparing ourselves to be found by that person?

credits to instagram

It is easy to introduce oneself and make a beautiful projection of your image but what counts most is how you feel when you do it. Does it make you feel comfortable? Are you being true to yourself or just making yourself likeable so you’ll have a partner? Does it bring out the best or the beast in you?

We’ve all done that, c’mon let’s be honest here. But I realized that sharing your true self goes a long way. You don’t have to be perfect but atleast be sincere with your purpose why you want to have a partner. Maybe you want to have a partner because your friends are all married or in a long-term committment? or maybe you are bored because you always meet an empty home after work? or maybe you want some companion, a cuddling time and spend a hot night together but not really ready to commit? Or maybe because you feel old that you are being left behind by your colleagues? Or maybe you want to secure your future financially? Well, all those things should not be the reason why you want a partner for life because in reality, these are just some reasons to have a temporary to almost-not-committed relationship. Be watchful of it. Try looking back to your previous relationship where it did not last… What was your main goal why you get into that in the first place?

A few times in my life, I thought I was ready to have a relationship.. I thought I met the best because I felt happy when we hangout and date (plus sweet words) and that I felt attached to my ex- bf/s and I want it because I felt like I am at the right age already. I was so willing to overlook their flaws and accept everything. Flaws that I thought just minor things but in reality, those are the ones that caused our separation.

That was also the reason I chose to give up the search. I realized that when I keep on searching, and I meet some people, in my mind I always ask „Is he The One?“ and next to it is to try if we fit each other and sometimes just because I long to have a partner, little that I know that I make less consideration to the much important things and forget to ask myself „Am I truly prepared to enter relationship all in all? How am I going to handle it?“ or „Am I willing to commit to this person for real?“

I don’t ever give up on love. I actually really want to find what’s for me, but not anymore in the way that doesn’t work. I still believe that being honest, sincere and having respect are some of the most important things to take note of from a potential partner. Without it, it’s never gonna work out.

Having a good purpose for being in a relationship will help you see and recognize what you really want. It is not just all about spending good times together, but also overcoming challenges and being able to commit to one another without dishonoring your faith.

Also, preparing yourself well helps you get one step closer to finding it. Addressing emotional issues like fear and doubt. I’ve been thru a heavy and hard family problem and whenever I recall it, I fear that those will also happen to me… I fear that a relationship will not work on me too and I felt that my heart was broken over and over again, especially when I encounter some conflicts with someone. I know it is not good and will never serve me well.

But as I look at my 2 handsome brothers on how they manage their relationships to their girlfriends, I realized that I want a man like them… They make every effort for the ones they love with sincerity and really mean it. I know that their girlfriends never felt jealous of any woman because they made their girls secure. My brothers have female friends as well and they hangout together but I see the limitation they’ve set on that. They talk also to other people especially to women but they never flirt with them.

For me that is the thing I like of a man. I want him to have his own life but not that he doesn’t care about my feelings. I like that he has his circle but not that he has hidden agenda to his friends such as secretly liking his female friend or so….and I finally felt comfortable because now I know what I exactly want.

Yesterday, I prayed so hard and asked for a sign if there really is someone out there for me… so I picked one from the 2 rolled papers, like it is a yes or a no… and I was able to pick „There is“ I did it twice and got the same result… My heart felt happy that even if I haven’t met him yet, I know that he is reserved for me and yeah… I have more reasons to really give up the search.

Psalm 37:4

Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Proverbs 19:14

House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD.

1 Corinthians 7:27
Are you pledged to a woman? Do not seek to be released. Are you free from such a commitment? Do not look for a wife.

Are you still looking for him/her? Give up The Search.